Doomed to disappointment, I soon settled down on the lookout post. My people called it the living room couch, but I knew better. It offered an excellent view of anyone coming down the driveway and up the walk. (Sometimes I did sleep on the job.)
"Good morning, Muff.
"This message is to tell you that your people Bob and Carole, will be leaving the imediate vicnity for the next four days. In their place will be a young woman named Kate.
"According to our information, you have previously met Kate. Almost one year ago, she came at one other time when your people were away.
"This appearance only when the your people are away is extremely suspicious. Your Job, should you choose to accept it, is to safeguard and protect your house against the presence of this stranger.
"This message will self-destruct in five seconds. Good luck, Muff."
I watched the smoke swirl up from the tape recorder that had played me such a blow. My people were going away again. I drew myself up proudly. And they had left ME in charge. I would do anything I could to protect the house. I moved off to see if I could find a stashed Army Surplus fighter plane somewhere on the premises.
Doomed to disappointment, I soon settled down on the lookout post. My people called it the living room couch, but I knew better. It offered an excellent view of anyone coming down the driveway and up the walk. (Sometimes I did sleep on the job.)
It was from this position that I plotted my strategy. And it was from this position that I saw her first arrive Sunday night. Immediately I ran to my hiding spot, tucking myself back in far enough so that the enemy couldn't see me. I heard her move about and call my name, but true to my oath, I did not let myself be found.
That night, after all of the lights were out (I remembered from last year that she walked in the dark, so I checked to make sure that she was in bed), I ventured forth only to find that the only things changed were that her things were in the bedroom, and that she had put out fresh food for me.
I had forgotten that she fed me regularly. It was a break. It is hard to find food when you are on a spying mission. The next morning, she arose at six, a respectable hour, and proceeded to get ready and she left soon. I prowled all morning, but could find nothing out of place. Why was she dangerous? Why should I protect the house against HER?
She returned in the early afternoon and settled down and went to sleep. After that, she got supper. I've never seen a spy do anything LESS dangerous. The next day followed the same routine with the exception that after her nap, she graded some papers instead. What a dull life spies actually lead! So much for all of those books filled with dangerous adventures.
Through all of this, she fed me. I graced her with a couple of brief peeks at me, but the monment she tried to be friendly, I raced for the hiding spot. It would not do for the only soldier on one side to be captured before the war was over! All in all, I would bet (if I were a betting cat) that she saw me less than five minutes put together.
Tuesday night she had that noisy boy child over again. I remember him. He's dangerous. I peeked around a corner to refresh my memory of him, and then hid for the rest of night. What a coward I was!
Mighty feats of heroism followed by Thursday. I noticed that the girl washed the linens on the bed. Could it be? Could it be that my people were returning? She began to clear all of her things, washed the dishes, swept the floor., etc. It was true, then! Slowly, I walked out into the kitchen and watched her actions carefully, determined to stop her from sabotaging the house. She worked quickly, and finally told me that my people would be home in the afternoon.
As I wandered around the kitchen table, I noticed that she had written two notes. Curious, I read them, only to discover that they were addressed to my people and not to me. These notes seemed innocent, but important. I memorized them both.
The girl seemed to have no problems while she was here. She was away much of the day and either slept or worked in the evenings. I still see no reason to protect the house against such a creature. She didn't DO anything. And, so, neither did I.
If you require more information, contact Agent Scaredy Cat.
THIS NOTE WAS FOUND ON THE FLOOR IN THE BASEMENT, BELOW A HOLE THAT SEEMED TO BE A HIDING PLACE FOR SOME WILD ANIMAL. BEING THE PROPERTY OF BOB AND CAROLE, I LEAVE IT FOR THEN TO READ AND DESTROY -- THIS MESSAGE WILL SELF DESTRUCT IN FIFTY YEARS.
