If you have any additional verses of this song, please email them to Dave Martucci.
When I was a young lad I used to like girls,
I played with their bodies and fondled their curls.
Till my girl ran off with a Captain named Bruce.
Oh you'll never get treated like that by a moose!
When I'm in the mood for a good lay,
I go to the closet and get me some hay.
I open the window and spread it around,
Cause the moose always come when there's hay on the ground!
I've done it with all sorts of beasties with hair;
I'd do it with snakes if their fangs were not there,
I've done it with llamas, sheep, dogs and a goose,
But I've never had anything quite like a moose!
Now a gorilla is all right for a Saturday night,
And lions and tigers they put up a fight.
But it's just not the same when you slam their caboose
Like the feeling you get when you hump on a moose.
The king of the gods is a fellow named Zeus,
On top of Olympus with an urge to seduce.
They offered him virgins but he'd just refuse,
"Screw all of your virgins and bring me a moose!"
And now I am old and advanced in my years.
As I look o'er my life, I will shed me no tears.
So I sit in my chair with a glass of prune juice,
Playing hide the salami with Marvin the Moose!
Oh, the bride of ol' Cherry, it's never been told
Had surrendered her virtue indecently bold
But she still has her Cherry - she's happy his wife
This here's proof that a matron can have one for life.
Donald Post - dpost@gbn.net:
When I go a huntin', I don't take a gun,
I just take myself and have lots of fun.
I get up behind them, then get myself loose,
Now I've never had anything quite like a moose!
Kevin Erickson - kevtrout@everett.com:
When I was a boy, playboy got me excited,
but now I am older - the yearn for babes has subsided,
I still get horned up and I still get wet dreams,
from ogling naked Moose in my new Field and Stream.
So when I'm alone and I get out the lotion,
and set Rosie and her five good friends into motion,
I'm not fantasizing about naked women on the loose,
but of fondling and groping on a beautiful Moose.
Benjy \"Mooseolini\" Feen - b-feen@staff.uiuc.edu:
Oh give me a moose in a long flowered skirt
A touch of mascara or blush couldn't hurt
With lipstick or perfume you'd think she's a queen
And with moose it's still legal if they're under eighteen.
Colin Corbett - ccorbett@cohesive.com:
I've tried many creatures on land or at sea
I've even tried ostrich, but they didn't like me
Sharks are quite good but they're hard to pull loose
But on dry land theres nothing quite like a moose
Woodchucks are alright except that they bite
And foxes and rabbits wont last through the night
Cows would be fun but they're hard to seduce
But you never should worry should you find a moose
Step into my study and you will find there
A black striped tiger and a scruffy maned bear
You'll know the elephant because his skin is so loose
And the one that is winking you know is the moose
The lion succumbed to five dirty tricks
And ballistas and tigers I've proved just don't mix
The elephant he fell in a pit on a noose
But I won't tell a soul how I did in the moose
I've found many women attracted to me
A few of them have had me over for tea
Some say they love me when they're feeling loose
But I'd trade the world's women for one lovely moose
The good lord made Adam and a woman named Eve
Said if you sin now I'll ask you to leave
They left not because of Eve's forbidden fruit
But because Adam decided the moose, they were cute
The English are said to like boars who've had corn
The Celts they dream of the young unicorn
The Germans are happy with leather and rope
But give me a moose and I'll no longer mope
Well I've broken the law in this godawful state
And they've put me in prison and locked up the gate
they say that tomorrow I'll swing from a noode
but my last night I'll spend with a good sexy moose
There have been questions recently regarding the history of this song. I am personally familiar with it since 1984. It was obviously ten years or more older then. Anyone got more personal history to share?
16328 verses sung since 5/1/96!
THANKS TO THE SONG WRITERS * K E E P 'E M 'C O M I N G !
If you have any additional verses of this song, please email them to Dave Martucci.
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